Humor Time - You Know You Are Interviewing With The Wrong Company When:

Hey Jobschmobbers, lets spread a little humor today. Imagine the worst case scenario when you interview with a company and they share an outrageous benefit which lets you know you are in the wrong place.

This is based on a scenario which once happened to me. I interviewed for a job as a programmer and was told that all looked good, I would be making base salary and would be given a key to the building. When I asked why I would need a key I was told so I could come in on weekends! I asked why would I do that for (pitiful salary)$? I was told 'that's just normal, we work 60 hours a week here!'

I told the interviewer: Not for THAT salary!

Anyway, let me get this started:

You know you are interviewing with the wrong company when:

#1: The benefits package includes free yearly stress tests.
#2: The company vending machine stocks prozac.

Add your own!

POST A COMMENTCK(10/23/2008)
The company's front door is a revolving door.

You get trampled by the stampeding of employees rushing out the door (at 5:00 o'clock SHARP)!

Catbox(10/23/2008)
no one gets together outside of work
the bathroom is always full of people hiding-out
someone spikes the water cooler


SouthernProgrammer(10/24/2008)
The HR department gives you the name of the company doctor...Jack Kevorkian..

UnsupportedSupport(10/24/2008)
The introductory video suggests watching all of the customers very closely because "anyone with an opportunity to steal, will always steal from you." (True Story)

UnsupportedSupport(10/24/2008)
They make you take multiple personality tests along with the basic skills tests.

SouthernProgrammer(10/24/2008)
The Front Desk Administrator is wearing a T-Shirt that says "Property Of [State Name] Prison System"

CK(10/24/2008)
Authorized to use deadly force at the doorway (true story).

BonusOnus(10/24/2008)
Upon entering the front lobby, there's a sign listing the corporate values. Third is something that goes like "We trust and value our employees"

Then going out, there's a sign that says that all employees leaving work are subject to search of their personal belongings.

True story.

BonusOnus(10/24/2008)
Oh, this happened just recently, when I was interviewing at a lot of companies in the Silicon Valley.

At one company, a future coworker said "We don't have an American work environment. We have an Indian work environment here."


My response was "Well, thanks for your time" and I walked out the door. He was the 1st interviewer out of 8 that were planned that day.

labtech(10/25/2008)
You approach the building for the interview to find it covered by cameras that follow your every move, after you pass the uptight security guard who has to page three times to talk to the person who invited you there. You find there's a security lock on the front door that requires you to be buzzed in, and it doesn't work, nor do the lobby lights; they're burnt out, but by God the security people know where you are now. You finally get someone to open the broken door and they look like the Bride of Frankenstein with a hangover. Every boss you see looks like a GQ cover, or out-on-the-town pimp, or some hippie freak; every worker looks like the walking dead. You pass by buckets in the hallway, dripping some kind of black watery goo, and there are repairmen in there working on some broken equipment. This is where I work, by the way.

CK(10/25/2008)
You know you are interviewing with the wrong company when:

The boss keeps a full loaded Super-Soaker in his desk drawer - to which he uses to shoot emloyees! (true story)

dontask 0(10/25/2008)
You know that you are interviewing with the wrong company as soon as you pull in the parking lot while a car alarm is screeching, the thief is still at it and security is looking the other way. Keep going job seeker.

CK(10/28/2008)
As soon as you walk in the building the Angel of Death starts following you around.

dontask 0 :)(10/28/2008)
And the angel of death comes with a security uniform and a gun?

CK(10/29/2008)
The workplace comes with a dungeon.

CK(11/02/2008)
When your potential employer plays music like "Stairway to Heaven" backwards because it puts him in the spirit (or is that 'put the demon in him?')

FedUp-Timeout(11/10/2008)
When HR and every one who interviews you keeps telling you that this company is the best place to work.

Obama(11/11/2008)
When you have a private briefing and find out just how bad the economy really is....

HaveADamnNiceDay(11/11/2008)
When they declare a 'welcome cake' and a birthday cake as a perk of being with the company.....

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