Posted on 02/16/2006 by I'm The Man!
Viewed: 1057 times
So you'll all love this, and I'm so excited there is a quit category. Anyway months ago I had had enough of my job. My only goal was to secure employment elsewhere... which I did. This brings me to my story. So about 2 weeks ago I got my offer letter in the mail. I bought a 4 pack of Guinness stout beer, put my oldest most torn jeans on, and went to work. I threw absolutely everything away that was at my desk. So while sitting at my empty cube...I pulled up a fantastic picture of Santa's butt with an elf stuck in the crack, and maximized it on my screen. Then... I put my feet on my desk, whipped out the four-pack and cracked open a fresh beer and just sat there and drank it. The worlds biggest jerk boss took about 30 minutes to finally catch wind of my behavior, so by then I was on my second bottle, with the empties and caps being the only objects besides phone and computer on my desk. The big jerk walked over and said "what do you think you are doing", and I responded "Oh, just wanted to come in and give you notice that I quit". Then I said "I'd tell you I'm giving my two weeks notice, but knowing how all of your employees get security escorts out of the building on the day they give notice I didn't think it was necessary". And before he could call the gaurds I stood up, grabbed my 2-pack and my one open bottle and walked to the door singing Willie's "Take this job and shove it". It was the most exhilirating day in my career!
corporateSlave(02/16/2006)
ONE CAN ONLY DREAM. Vicariously. That's how I'll live.
Spencer(02/16/2006)
ALL HAIL THE KING OF GUINESS! I don't care what my nagging wife says...TONIGHT, I will pour a cold one and toast your honor and dream of the day I grow the balls to do it myself. Carry on brilliantly, brother.
I'm The Man!(02/16/2006)
Okay okay, before ya'all Hail the King too much I have to fess up about something. I got a call later in the day...and because I had alcohol on the premises, they wouldn't accept my 'resignation' and instead I was actually 'fired' on record. But I don't care, same darn thing... I just have to be careful in the future to be sure they are never used as a reference check.
twizzler(02/16/2006)
Well considering your exit, I doubt they would be a good reference in any case. Though I find that you can always find someone there that you liked (and liked you) to use as a reference regardless! I think the fact that you were fired cannot be revealed if any one calls regarding a reference. Not sure about that though.
john locke(02/16/2006)
There's always a "but"... Well, congrats on the innovation in any case. But thank you, "I am the Man", for letting us know about the aftermath. I, for one, appreciate your honesty. Your story is really a one for the books.
solomon(02/16/2006)
I do not advise alcohol at work, ever. It can only lead to problems, as written above.
friday hotness(02/16/2006)
oh stuff it, solomon. I think this story is an inspiration. Life - Alcohol = Death.
granularity(02/16/2006)
chiming in: Life - (Alcohol + Work) + Firing = Big Black Mark on Your Record
vanilla ginger(02/16/2006)
You Sir, are my hero.
C- -(02/16/2006)
Love the story and the comments. I had a similar exit planned minus the alcohol. Even knew exactly what I was going to say to the most obnoxious regular passengers on the bus home; the ones who yak until they exit an hour later. Alas it was not to be. You managed to do what we all dream of, only I would have gone even further. As it turned out the bad mouthing happened anyway. Not being a beer lover I drink my next glass of wine remembering your story.
cnubelevit(02/17/2006)
Congradulations. You have just been promoted to captain in the "damn the man" army. You are an example to us all. Keep up the good work.
stealthgirlniki(02/17/2006)
I think I love you. If only I had the nerve... and the replacement job...
RedStapler(02/17/2006)
You must be Irish...only an Irishman could be so smart!
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