Home > Outsourcing America
Bill THIS by the hour, you witch
Posted on 11/21/2005 by Turkey Lover
Viewed: 642 times
This past May I was outsourced (basically traded) to a sourcing company. I work in the same building I worked in before but I am technically employed by the new sourcing company. Lot of details here that just give me too much of a headache to explain. Anyway I have just been informed that while everyone else---most of the people who sit all around me and who were kept at my old employer---get to leave at noon on Wednesday to get ready for the Thanksgiving holiday, I will have to stay! I was totally expecting to do the same, since nobody will even be here (or care). But my foo foo boss, who doesn't even work in my time zone, just informed me that "oh no you will not be leaving, you will stay until your shift ends" because I am "billed by the hour". WTF. It wasn't my choice to go work for this stupid new company, they forced me!! And now all the stuff I used to enjoy about working here is gone. Gone gone gone. I'll tell you what, Ms. Foo Foo, I might have to stay here, but I'm going to piss away the entire afternoon. And probably the morning now too, you slavedriving witch! Come to think of it, I'm just going to sit and draw outlines of my hand and color them in as turkeys all day. I'll make one for each of your personalities. To honor you, here's a list of my fun turkey crafts:
1. The Stuck-Up turkey - I'll make different color feathers.
2. The Backsatbbing Turkey - I'll put a plastic knife in its mouth.
3. The Materialistic Turkey - I'll bling it out with paper clips and staples.
4. The Slave-Driving Turkey - I'll draw a hitler mustache on it.
and last but not least...
5. The How-I-Really-Got-To-The-Top Turkey - I will spread its feathers apart.
AND FOR ALL THIS I'LL GET BILLED BY THE HOUR.
Spencer(11/21/2005)
BLOODY BRILLIANT!
 RedStapler(11/21/2005)
Hilarious! Hilarious! Hilarious! If she is in a different geo-location, can't you skip out early anyway (after you create the Turkey crafts that is)? If you do the turkey crafts...can you take a picture for us? Does the forward on your phone work, to forward to your cell? Last but not least, what are they going to do...fire you for leaving early the day before TG?
corporateSlave(11/21/2005)
Where's cnubelevit? He needs to read this one! Some good ideas here! I think I am going to make my boss a "Head Up His Ass" Turkey. I wil cut the "thumb" part of the turkey off and glue it to the butt.
SouthernProgrammer(11/21/2005)
Managment Turkey - Have it looking up at little rain drops with its mouth open. Then have smaller "supervisor" turkeys also looking up with their mouths open...
SouthernProgrammer(11/21/2005)
Turkey Lover, I guess "she showed you" whose boss didn't she? People like this are so annoying because they manage by 'intimidation' and pass it off as leadership. Just enjoy yourself cutting out turkeys and be thankful you don't really work for her anymore....
 cnubelevit(11/21/2005)
Brother CorporateSlave! I IS HERE! Turkey Lover...Sounds like La Bruha (witch in Spanish) may just have a crush on you. Take a naked picture (from the neck down) with the turkey over your "hard drive" or "soft ware" which ever the case may be and send it to her anonymously.
Walk the Planks(11/21/2005)
Gobble, gobble! ;) Why don't you mail the turkeys to her, too. You can arrange them in a nice little basket -- like an Easter basket -- to send to her. Let her go bonkers trying to figure out where they came from. It's the least you can do!
outsourced as well(11/22/2005)
Loved you post! I'm in the same boat as you, I was outsourced in October a year ago. Now every time there is a holiday, my former co-workers can leave early, while I have to finish up my day. I'm even aware of managers from the client side who are checking that we (the contractors) work our full hours!
YepBeenThereDoneThat(11/22/2005)
You're so cool! Maybe you can also make your boss a little Pilgrim hat or a construction paper Indian headdress to go with the nifty turkey hand cutouts.
 ACube2Graphic(05/02/2006)
Hey, let's not give us witches a bad name now....
post a comment»
JobSchmobber Community Comments
|
|
|
Company memo that Belfort Instruments needComments (10)
Good Girls Finish LastComments (9)
web designerComments (2)
A rock and a hard placeComments (1)
I dunno what to thinkComments (6)
I was sworn under oath...I told the truthComments (7)
Still Blaming it on 9/11Comments (1)
Good Customer ServiceComments (3)
 |
What You're Talkin' About: The Most Recent Comments
|
|
|
© 2005 JobSchmob.com | Media Kit | About Us | Contact Us | FAQ | Newsletter Signup! | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | RSS
|
view comments (10)
e-mail story
post a comment
tell your story