A recent post here at JobSchmob.com brings back to me the reason why bullies-male or female- should never be hired the first place.
The main power they have is the absolute promise that chaos and destruction will be their final act of leaving the business.
The good news is that, like the rest of their miserable professional and personal lives, they are inept and childish at causing harm once exposed and on the way out.
It's always amazed me at how infantile these types are once they know that their games don't work anymore.
One co-worker screamed so loud upon being called to account for their actions that a colleague commented that her ears had been damaged by it. The offender's response? "I hope you never hear your dying children's cries..."!!! The police were promptly summoned. She told them that we had plotted to kill her. Was she unwell? Yes. Did her actions indicate anger and hatred to others before? Yes. Was the management of the business afraid of all of this. Absolutely.
At the same time, the palpable feeling of relief at her final departure was obvious.
The same goes for a deranged male salesworm that was fond of tossing desks over when upset. He "knew" we were all talking about him...
Of course we were after he did something like that!!
I could go on, but it would be more of the same.
Have you got any similar tales? Let me know by posting a comment!
Like any other unpleasant separation, getting rid of a workplace bully or mob is uncomfortable. Yet, the rewards for doing so are immediate and very rewarding. Don't let the f-word...FEAR...rule your actions!
twiz(07/31/2007)
I use to work with a guy that would talk really loud when he felt threatened. Got to the point where he would almost be yelling. It started on the phone... we'd hear him talking to his wife... then the voice would raise louder... and louder... until we were all pretty much embarrassed for him and his wife's privacy. Then it started happening at work. In meetings his voice would skyrocket... it was like some sort of tactic to get his point across and stop anyone from disputing him.
We mostly just laughed to ourselves... =)
the confessor(07/31/2007)
I know there are some that might say that these people were mentally ill and needed compassion, not criticism. At the same time, when these behaviors were pointed out and even witnessed by management, they were brushed off as being due to stress. It was also implied that we as co-workers were somehow causing these behaviors!
BTW, the mass killer at Virginia Tech showed many of the signs that the male salesrep had, with higher ups also ignoring the threat until it was too late.
dumber than a box of catsh*t(07/31/2007)
I once had a Boss that was a really tall and fat man. When he wanted attention he would become volcanic--all red in the face and hyperventilate--I was waiting for him to pop. I agree with twiz--he did it to prevent others from disputing him.
labtech(08/01/2007)
We had something weird happen this week. One of the techs that nobody talks to (she's hostile and uncommunicative to anyone who does not have the same skin tone as she does) ran off to tell the boss that we're all talking about her friend Baby Boy and saying mean things.... But nobody said anything to her. Nothing was said to her at all about anything, and nothing was said near her that she could overhear - we avoid her like the emotional leper that she is. She made it up, and ran to tell the boss...so she doesn't get in trouble and we look bad ? And now, just like you, we're talking about her. She is also beloved of Mama....and anything she says is taken as gospel, even if it's a complete lie !
been there(08/01/2007)
About two years ago, I resigned from a six-figure salaried position because in this case, the bully was the head of my department. Although she was also an employee there, she had a "special" relationship with the owner/president of the company. They are both married to different people. After nine years of putting up with her indifference and bullying tactics, I had to leave. I felt as if I would have a nervous breakdown if I didn't take action and move on. She use to do things like: While my colleagues and I struggled to meet a deadline, that was always impossible to reach unless we all worked overtime, she would call 2 hour meetings every half hour to talk about irrelevant things that had nothing to do with us, so that she could waste our entire day, so that we would have to put in more overtime (we were saleried so, no one got paid for overtime!). One time, shortly before I resigned, she pulled her usual taunt, and I just left work that day exactly on time. Not one minute past quiting time. I had so much work to do, I knew I would be paying the price later on by leaving work on time but, I didn't care about that. I just didn't want to give her the satisfaction of letting her see me working into the night while she left work on time. I ran into her on the elevator. She was looking at me like she wanted to burn a hole through my head with her eyes. She also seemed perplex as to how I could afford to leave work ontime when we were butting up against a deadline. I just smiled and pretended like nothing happend. She then got this horrified look on her face, like as if she was wondering if I was not planning to come back. I think for a moment she thought that I was going to walk out on the project and never set foot again at work. The following day, she called a meeting first thing in the morning and informed us all, that she realized how much work we all have, and that she would keep it short and not call us in for anymore meetings until after the deadline. I guess I scared her into behaving like a normal human being. Anyway, this kind of stuff use to happen all the time there. No one would dare report her to the president of the company because of her affair with him. She got away with this bullshit all the time. I knew it was a loosing battle so, after nine years of putting up with her crap, I finally left. It is a shame but, sometimes one is left to choose between two evils. I took some time off after leaving and I am now looking for employment. It was only after I left that I realized how much the stress at that place exhausted and wore me out.
planmaker(08/01/2007)
been there--everyone knows I am leaving when I finish my house and it sells. Due to the nature of my job--being a teacher--the Boss has left me alone--he is scared I will walk at a very bad time--like the day grades are due or it is parent-teacher conferences. I am going to go out of my way to make his fears come true.
been there(08/02/2007)
Planmaker-good for you! Do what you have to and always put yourself and your needs first. Believe me(which I am sure you already know),no one will think of you and your needs for you. Explore your options...remember...no job is irreplaceable.
CookieHooker(08/09/2007)
I should have read this earlier. Because that lovely employee who told me to rot in H*ll and that I would f-up my kids, went to my bully boss's boss and they just put ME on probation for creating a "hostile workplace" I have until 5pm today to accept their terms of probation, including a wage freeze or give my resignation.
Meanwhile, my bully boss who did not get implicated in the "hostile workplace" has been literally skipping around the office in the best mood I have seen her in three years.
I am by the way.... doing exactly the same thing (acting all happy), just to annoy the heck out of her...
the confessor(08/10/2007)
I'd definitely get ahold of a lawyer TODAY and document everything including a the idiot that skips through the office.
If you were really some kind of psycho, they would have you removed immediately instead of trying to psychologically torture you to death. And what's this crap about "wage freeze"? Get an attorney to negotiate a severance package at THEIR expense. Make it clear that they are blaming the victim-YOU-in this process. It is a hallmark of all bullies, including rapists and domestic abusers.
Strength and honor to you!
CookieHooker(08/28/2007)
Well, I stayed at the job, just until I get another one.
What I think is funny, is that they have now asked me to train the new-hire. I told them I didn't want to. I told them if they thought my performance was so terrible, the new hire would be trained to deliver the same results as me. I also made the mistake of pointing out that my job description does not say I am to train anyone. I was told the "not my responsibility" attitude about training the new hire was lazy and that if I was told to train, then I would train. I wanted to be out before they started, not going to happen.
The new hire starts tomorrow (8/29). They did hire a man, but when he came in he had bad body odor, didn't look me in the eye, and gave me the "dead fish" handshake….hmmmm….. . He also called in today because he was not sure what time he was supposed to start tomorrow. I hope first impressions are wrong.
On a happy note: the Crony that quit and claimed hostile work environment, launched an investigation with the Dept. of Labor, which came back with nothing, so she was denied unemployment. One of the clique members was talking about Crony (because Crony came into the office today while I was at lunch) and said this and that she had turned down several job offers in the next city over, just because she just doesn’t want to work. I’m not sure I trust anything this co-worker says about Crony because she plays both sides of the fence, maybe I’ll call her Mugwump.
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