The recent uproar over Don Imus' racist comments have brought two things to mind. As a longtime broadcaster (I still work part-time), it reminds me that when in doubt, don't say it! As a crusader for an end to workplace mobbing and bullying, it reminds me that these destructive behaviors constitute some of the last bastions of discrimination.
The truth is only the best are bullied or mobbed. It doesn't matter what color, creed, or gender-if you're a top performer with no real protection from management, you will inevitably be targeted. The ones attacking have a familiar profile. They are insecure, angry people that want to ensure that none get ahead of them, even if it means destroying innocent careers and lives. Not to mention the profitability of the company they work for.
Since these attacks occur regardless of one's background, they are often passed off as "personality conflicts" or "professional competition". Organizing others to harass, ridicule, and systematically undermine someone who is seen as doing an excellent job is hardly professional.
This from Bullyonline.org:
The bully selects their target using the following criteria:
bullies are predatory and opportunistic - you just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time; this is always the main reason - investigation will reveal a string of predecessors, and you will have a string of successors
being good at your job, often excelling
being popular with people (colleagues, customers, clients, pupils, parents, patients, etc)
more than anything else, the bully fears exposure of his/her inadequacy and incompetence; your presence, popularity and competence unknowingly and unwittingly fuel that fear
being the expert and the person to whom others come for advice, either personal or professional (ie you get more attention than the bully)
having a well-defined set of values which you are unwilling to compromise
having a strong sense of integrity (bullies despise integrity, for they have none, and seem compelled to destroy anyone who has integrity)
having at least one vulnerability that can be exploited
being too old or too expensive (usually both)
refusing to join an established clique
showing independence of thought or deed
refusing to become a corporate clone and drone
Please notice that if someone were treated this way because of color, gender, sexual preference, etc., this would be illegal. Yet this behavior has become epidemic, perhaps because of specific discrimination laws.
RedVelvetFlames(04/23/2007)
Everything regarding the victim is right on target. When the new Director of Admin. was hired he did not like the staff still came to me with their grievances and workplace decisions. I was a threat. Knew this from the minute I interviewed him trouble was coming. Don Imus had it coming. Not the first time he stuck his foot in his mouth. It's about time something was done. Howard Stern was constantly in trouble with the FCC for the slightest things (not that I am a huge fan of his, but fair is fair). What makes his firing more interesting is prior to NBC sending out the notice of his suspension numerous meetings were held with the employees. Not one -- Not ONE --Employee went to his defense and all screamed for his head. This says a mouthful to me as to the type of boss he was. I have 12 former co-workers who contacted me and stated if I need for them to testify on my behalf as to the type of boss I was just give them a shout. Moral of the story. BE NICE to your subordinates/co-workers. No one is better than the next regardless of the position you hold. Everyone is just trying to earn a living and put food on the table.
Cellophane Girl(04/23/2007)
Thank you for the information. This reminds me of a post I read on here (maybe a month ago?) that was from a young woman who was being berated by a gaggle of older women in her office. They would say negative things about her loudly so she could hear them. The behavior you outline leaves no room for argument, those women were bullies! How sad that this behavior doesn't go out of style after high school. I really didn't realize what a problem this was until I came to this site.
In your opinion, do you think this is mainly an American problem or do you see it present in other cultures? And if so, which ones? Sorry for all the questions, maybe you can write about bullies in other cultures too. Sorry I don't mean to give you homework, I guess I could do my own research but I am interested in your thoughts. I'll just wait and keep reading!
the confessor(04/23/2007)
It is a worldwide phenomena. It was actually first identified in a Swedish study about thirty years ago. Since then, studies have been conducted in places like Germany, Australia/New Zealand, and Canada.
UK researcher Tim Field (a targer of bullying himself) began the Bullyonline.org site and has lectured and published extensively on this. To him we owe a great debt. He estimates that 1-in-30 adults has this kind of antisocial personality and cost the world economy many billions. It is also the cause of untold human misery, some of which leads to workplace homicides and suicides.
Cellophane Girl(04/23/2007)
One in thirty!!!!! OMG. I was thinking it was a worldwide situation because it seems to be human nature rather than a learned social behavior. With that in mind. I don't see how we can change it...? Only educate people how to deal with it?
the confessor(04/23/2007)
I'll address that in my next blog
RedVelvetFlames(04/23/2007)
Actually there is a bill on the table calle the "Anti-bullying Healthy Workplace Bill." You can read about it on
The problem I have found is I have tons of friends who have horror stories, but no one wants to fight for this bill. They are happy just venting about the job online or look for another job.
SouthernProgrammer(04/23/2007)
Disclosure - I am not a fan of IMUS though I think he is thought provoking and I think what he said is wrong. Having said that, if people were truly offended then we need to start looking at banning rap songs because they contain lyrics that are even more offensive!
bigblue(04/23/2007)
Being bullied is a prime reason for my decision to not to continue to be a teacher--the Boss bullying me into passing kids who don't deserve it, the parents bullying you and the kids are bullies to eachother and the teachers. I can hold my own--no one can intimidate me--but I just don't want to deal with it anymore.
At least when I am self-employed I can choose to cut the ties with someone who bullies but in my current situation I cannot.
sheila(04/23/2007)
SouthernProgrammer: You said, "if people were truly offended". Seriously I hope you mistyped and did not really mean "if". What about the targets of his comments? How could those young women NOT be offended. It is our job as forward thinking humans to be offended on their behalf. And it is my job as woman---regardless of race---to be offended on their behalf. Indeed!!!
avid reader(04/23/2007)
sheila: AMEN sister! I do think rap songs need to be cleaned up. But that goes for TV too. Confessor: you said it beautifully when you said "Organizing others to harass, ridicule, and systematically undermine someone who is seen as doing an excellent job is hardly professional". Mmmmmah!
the confessor(04/24/2007)
As far as Imus goes...
Everyone that I've ever witnessed getting into trouble in broadcasting (and I've been in it since 1980) for something that they've said clearly did not think through what they were saying first. This includes saying that
Burl Ives was an "old fart" the day after his death, describing Princess Diana as the "most expensive piece of a** on the earth" following hers, and saying that the Brady bunch boys were probably gay. Oh, and did I forget the comments about "Monica Jewinski"? All led to immediate termination for those saying them, and rightfully so. I tend to make fun of myself while on the air. There's an abundance of material, and the chances of offending others are slim to none.
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