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Jim Shields, CEO09/16/2005
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| From: |
Jim Shields, CEO |
| To: |
You |
| Date: |
09/16/2005 |
| Subject: |
50 Fun Things To Do In An Elevator |
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50 Fun Things To Do In An Elevator
- Make race car noises when people get on and off.
- Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
- Grimace painfully while slapping your forehead and muttering, "Shut up dammit, all of you just SHUT UP!"
- Whistle the first 7 notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
- Sell Girl Scout Cookies.
- On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the
elevator.
- Shave.
- Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask,
"Got
enough air in there?"
- Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear your
upside-down.
- Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without
getting off.
- When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors
open,
then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
- Lean over to another passenger and whisper, "Ever had a Wet Willy?"
- Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and
ask
them to call you "Admiral."
- One word: Flatulence!
- On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay
open
until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the
bottom.
- Do Tai Chi exercises.
- Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then
announce:
"I've got new socks on."
- When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back, "Oh, not
now,
damn motion sickness!"
- Give religious tracts to each passenger.
- Meow occasionally.
- Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
- Frown and mutter, "Gotta go, gotta go," then sigh and say, "oops!"
- Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
- Sing "Mary Had a Little Lamb" while continuously pushing buttons.
- Holler, "Chutes away!!" whenever the elevator descends.
- Walk on with a cooler that says "Human Head" on the side.
- Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce, "You're one
of
THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
- Burp, then say, "Mmmmm.....tasty!"
- Leave a box between the doors.
- Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
- Wear a hand puppet and talk to the other passengers "through" it.
- Start a sing-along.
- When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your
beeper?"
- Play the accordion.
- Shadow box.
- Say, "Ding!" at each floor.
- Lean against the button panel.
- Say, "I wonder what all these do?" and then push ALL the red
buttons.
- Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
- Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the
other
passengers that this is your "personal space."
- Bring a chair along.
- Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, "Wanna see wha
in
muh mouf??"
- Blow spit bubbles.
- Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
- Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host
body."
- Carry a blanket a clutch it protectively.
- Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
- Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
- Stare at your thumb and say, "I think it's getting bigger."
- If anyone brushes against you, recoil fiercely and scream, "BAD
TOUCH!"
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