JobSchmob.com - Advice Column


		LOG IN

Home > Advice Column

view comments (0) » e-mail this story

e-mail story »

April 29, 2005

Posted on 05/02/2005 by Alotta Candor
Viewed: 150 times

Dear Alotta,

I work in the office of an auto repair shop. I am 29 and my younger brother is 27. All his life he’s been in and out of trouble. He dropped out of high school and hasn’t been to a lick of school since. He hasn’t kept a job more than a few months and he even served a few months in jail for breaking into someone’s house. Well, now he wants me to get him a job at the shop I work at. Alotta, I have been there for 7 years and have worked very hard to carve out a good living for myself at a place I love. I have a very good relationship with the owners and do not want my brother waltzing in here and messing it up for me. I know he would mean bad news for this place. My entire immediate family is pressuring me to get him a job there and when I protest they say, "So what if he only stays a few months, at least you did the right thing to help". Alotta, I cringe at the thought of even a "few months" because I know what that can mean for the shop. Am I being too hard on him or am I right in wanting to protect the shop?

- Pressured in Portland

Dear Pressured,

What you’re trying to protect is not just the shop, but your reputation and your livelihood as well. You are absolutely right in guarding it. From the sounds of it, your brother will turn the auto shop into a demolition derby. So, yes, even a few months can cause major body damage. And I doubt you're going to want to spend the next year putting Bondo all over all the dents after his hit-and-run. You’re going to have to put on a brave face and tell your next of kin that he's got to look elsewhere. It's probably a safe bet that you're not gonna be the favorite to win around him and the fam…but you gotta do what you gotta do. So scrape up alotta courage and slam on the brake. The trick will be to keep picturing the worst car crash you can imagine and see yourself walking away from it without a scratch…because that's what you will have accomplished by saying "Sorry, no help wanted".

- Alotta, supportively

Dear Alotta,

I work in a small office with about 10 young women. Every time my husband and I get in a fight he sends me flowers at work the next day. This probably happens about every six weeks or so. I am not ungrateful, the flowers are always nice, but the problem is that all the women stop by my desk and gush about how beautiful they are and about what an amazing husband I have. And, on the occasions that he comes to the office, they all fawn over him because they think he's just a thoughtful man who likes to send flowers. He loves it and I really hate this! My husband is fine, but the flowers are always to make up for something he has done and it is getting harder and harder to stomach saying, "Oh yes, he's a good one all right" when one of these women raves about him. I tried asking him not to send anything anymore and lo and behold the next time we fought he outdid himself and sent four dozen red roses to my office! Alotta, how do I handle the flowers and these women?

- Not stopping to smell the roses

Dear Not,

Well my dear, I think you know that your main problem isn't a workplace problem. But you certainly have yourself what Alotta likes to call a workplace "spin-off" problem and that's the one you've asked her to address. As such, there are two ways you can approach this: You can address the flowers themselves, and nip it in the bud, by either discarding the flowers upon arrival or refusing to accept delivery in the first place. Or, you can address the women when they gush and let them know that the Magnolia they think you married is actually a Pansy. Hopefully they'll come to realize that when they smell flowers, they should look for a coffin. Alotta feels she needs to point out that, either way, eventually you're going to have to do some weeding in your own backyard.

- Alotta, metaphorically

« Previous Story | Next Story »

Remind you of something?

April 29, 2005

JobSchmobber Community Comments

What You're Talkin' About: The Most Recent Comments